The BoyFriend Tag
by StayWeird
Summary: "Yes it's on! I hit record thirty seconds ago" "Oh well then, I've never done this before. How do we start?" "I'll start. My name is Kim Crawford, beside me sits my loser of a boyfriend Jack Anderson-" "Hey!" "And this is the Boyfriend tag..."
1. Chapter 1

**HEY! It's night time and I cannot sleep. If you like my writing styles this is good news for you, because no sleep equals more stories! This is my first official one-shot for kick! Hope you enjoy. This idea just came to me, I haven't read a story like my idea before so I hope you like it. If you have read a similar story, let me know and I'll give the author credit. This is going to be an all dialog fan fic. Been reading a lot of those lately and the idea intrigues me tremendously. Anyways, hope you enjoy, Jack and Kim, the Boyfriend tag.**

**Setting: Kim and Jack are sitting side by side on the couch, with a video camera in front of them.**

"Kimmy is it playing?"

"..."

"Ow! What was that for?"

"Jack I told you to stop calling me Kimmy!"

"Well excuse me for trying to give my girlfriend a cheesy pet name. I could call you baby?"

"...Kimmy it is"

"That's what I thought"

"Anyways, yes it's on! I hit record thirty seconds ago"

"Oh well then, I've never done this before. How do we start?"

"I'll start. Hello people watching this via the internet. My name is Kim Crawford, beside me sits my loser of a boyfriend Jack Anderson-"

"Hey!"

"-and this is the boyfriend tag. A couple of my friends dared me to do it, so done it is. Hope you enjoy. Alright, question number one. _Where did you meet?_ Yeah Jack, where did we meet?"

"The Seaford High school cafeteria. My first day of school I caught her apple."

"Awwh, you remember,"

"Of course I remember. Question number 2. _Where was our first date _Kimmy_?"_

"..."

"Ow! Alright, you hit me again for calling you Kimmy, I going to call you baby!"

"...Fine. Anyways, are first date was at Circus Burger after the Ricky Weaver incident. That stupid-"

"Privet jet flying, San Francisco burger buying, hot tubing dolled haired monster?"

"Exactly. Number three. _What's one thing you don't like about each other_? What kind of a question is that!"

"Uh..."

"So Jack, what don't you like about me?"

"I love everything about you, you're perfect"

"That's the correct answer, but I want to know the real answer. I can think of a couple of things I don't like about you."

"Oh really? Well in that case, you're so needy."

"Pardon?"

"You constantly need to be reminded I like you because your insanely jealous."

"..."

"OW! And you hit me!... Love hurts."

"You're an idiot."

"Then why are you laughing?"

"..."

"That's what I thought. So Kimmy, what don't you like about me?"

"I really want to hit you... I don't like how I can never be mad at you"

"Come again?"

"You can screw up so bad, but as soon as I see you and you say you're sorry and look at me with your stupid big, brown eyes, I can't be mad anymore"

"That's cute. Good to know I can get away with things."

"..."

"OW STOP HITTING ME!"

"I love you?"

"Number 4. _How long have you been together and when is your anniversary?"_

"Three months come the seventeenth"

"Eighteenth"

"No seventeenth"

"It's the eighteenth"

"Jack it's the seventeenth"

"No"

"Yes"

"No"

"Yes"

"No"

"Yes"

"Ok, fine whatever. It's the seventeenth"

"That's what I thought. Kim Crawford is always right."

"No she isn't"

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"Mmmmhmmm. Number 5. _What's your favorite thing about your partner?"_

"I like the fact that she is herself. No matter who we are around, she never changes. Not for me, not for her friends, not for anyone. I love that."

"Yeah, of course he plays the personality card..."

"Plus she's smoking hot... Better?"

"...Much. I love his smile. He has one of those contagious smiles that when you see it you just have to smile back"

"..."

"Jack quit smiling at me..."

"..."

"Stop it!"

"..."

"..."

"OW! Stop hitting me!"

"Then stop smiling, you're making me laugh"

"Number 6. _Who wears the pants in your relationship?"_

"I do"

"No I do"

"Jack I defiantly wear the pants"

"I am the man, and men are superior therefore, I wear the pants"

"Uh, in what world? Are you kidding me! Hun, your whipped!"

"...I am not... Ok fine. But if being whipped gets me kisses, then I'm alright with that."

"That's cute. Number 7. _Who said I love you first_?"

"I did. I had to like force it out of her because she thought that was 'too big of a commitment at our age' and 'people throw love around like it's nothing' Blah blah blah..."

"..."

"What?"

"Are you done insulting me now?"

"Why yes, yes I am. Question 8..."

"Jack, why'd you cover your eyes?"

"WHAT'S MY EYE COLOR!"

"Coffee brown...?"

"Awwh you do know! I'm proud of you! By the way, yours is light brown"

"Alrighty then... 9. _What their favorite snack?"_

"Apples. She weird with them though! She like takes the potato cutter and takes off the skin, then continues shaving the apple, then eats the shavings! it's really weird!"

"... It tastes good"

"But it's weird"

"Oh hush. His is cereal"

"What cereal"

"Lucky Charms"

"..."

"..."

"Stop looking at me like that they're magically delicious! Question number 10. _What unique talent do they have?_ Wait, you don't have talent"

"..."

"OW. WELL?"

"That was rude. I have talent! It's just... undiscovered."

"Oh yeah, undiscovered, that's it. More like inexistent."

"He can squirt milk out of his nose."

"Don't tell people that!"

"Why not! You're telling them I'm talentless! Besides... Its cool. Number 11. _They are sitting in front of the T.V, what are they watching?"_

"Easy, Criminal minds."

"I love that show."

"I know you do Kim."

"Morgan is so hot."

"What was that?"

"I love you?"

"Mmmhmm..."

"You wouldn't be watching T.V. _You'd be playing video games."_

"You know me so well."

"I know."

"Number 12. You're out for dinner, what do they order?"

"He'd order a cheeseburger and salad... Heath nut."

"Hey, there's nothing wrong with eating a salad! She'd probably order a bacon cheeseburger, with fries and a chocolate shake. Fatass."

"..."

"OW. I deserved that one."

"Yeah you did. Three more. Number 13. _Who is their best friend?"_

"I am. I am her best friend. With out me she has no one."

"Oh yeah Jack, even though my FRIENDS dared me to do this, you know."

"The first step to getting help is admitting you have a problem Kimmy."

"Oh shut up. His is a tie between Jerry, Milton and Eddie."

"You forgot someone."

"Who'd I forget?"

"You."

"... Awhh"

"I thought it was good. Question number 14. _What is your favorite thing about your relationship_?"

"I like that we know how to turn it off. We were friends before so we know how to just be friends and chill with a group of people without having to be on top of each other like some couples I know. I find it comforting. But on the same note, we know how to be a couple. Like, he's not ashamed of holding the crazy girls hand in public"

"No I am not."

"No."

"...No what?"

"That's not the right answer. Your supposed to say "Kimmy, you're not crazy.'"

"Ok... Kimmy you're not crazy... Better?"

"Yes thanks. So Jack, what's your favorite thing about our relationship?"

"Referring back to the previous question. She's my best friend. Not a lot of guys can say their best friend is also their girlfriend. I like it because I know she's always going to be there for me, and no matter where we end up in the future, weather we're going out still or just friends, she'll always be apart of my life."

"... What are you implying?"

"Nothing Kim. I'm not implying anything."

"..."

"I love you. Don't get so paranoid you forget it."

"Moving in... Last but not least. Question number 15. _Have you done it yet?_ Done what?"

"..."

"WHAT THE HELL? Why would it ask that? God, people don't need to know that much into our relationship-"

"...Your welcome for closing her mouth. Before she brakes free because she is stronger than she looks, thanks for watching the boyfriend tag. It was... entertaining. Well, bye!... OW KIM DON'T BITE ME!"

**This amused me greatly. This is how I picture Kick, I honestly don't picture them all lovey dovey. I hope it amused you as well. My first dialog only Fic. Hope I didn't screw up that bad. Feel free to leave a review letting me know what you think. And I'm stressing that if someone else had this idea, let me know and I'll give them credit. In my opinion, this was a pretty fantastic idea if I do say so myself ;) So I wouldn't be overly surprised if someone did it before me. Anyways, let me know what you think. Worked really hard on it so please state your constructive criticism nicely. Thanks for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hola people. I was in need of some cheering up so I was re-reading reviews which always made me happy, when I came across a review mentioning the word 'test'. Which caused me to look up on the internet 'Boyfriend tests' like the ones you'd find in magazines. **

**This led me to inspiration. Yay inspiration! A lot of people liked the first one so I hope the follow up will be just as good. If I get a good response followed by inspiration I might turn this story into several one-shots about tests and quizzes possibly adding other couples. We'll see what happens :D**

**This story is not connected with the first, like it never happened. All dialoge once again. Please enjoy :)**

**Setting: Jack and Kim in Kim's messy room, magazines all over the floor.**

* * *

"Kim, what are you doing?"

"Shush."

"Shush?"

"Yes shush! Jack isn't it obvious I'm trying to do something?"

"Yes, hence my question 'What are you doing?'"

"I'm organizing."

"Is there a reason I'm here?"

"YES! You need to be tested!"

"Tested? If it's for STI's I don't think your room is the proper place to do it."

"Shut up you idiot, that's not what I meant. I mean boyfriend tested."

"Boyfriend tested? English please?"

"Technically it is English. It means that I get to ask you questions and you have to answer them. Now sit!"

"Sitting. Ok shoot."

"Really? You'd do it?"

"Did you not just tell me I had to?"

"Well yes, but I figured you'd come up with some sarcastic comment or some sort of excuse to get out of it. Well, attempt to get out of it anyways."

"If taking a stupid test proves my extremely amazing_ boyfriendness_ to you then I'll do it. You know, because my complete loyalty and being there for you for the past _year_ means absolutely nothing."

"See! There's the sarcastic comment! Ok, question number one. If you could take me out on any date, where would it be and why?"

"Well, because you hate me spending money on you, when I finally convince you to just let me freakin' pay 20 dollars mysteriously appears in my back pocket at the end of the night-"

"I'm a ninja eh?"

"That you are. So if I could manage to drag you, it would be a picnic on the beach. I've always wanted to do that."

"Then why haven't you?"

"I offered. 7 times, you keep turning me down."

"..."

"That's what I thought."

"Anyways, next question. I'm having an extremely bad day. What do you do?"

"Oh so everyday?"

"..."

"OW! Harsh woman, very harsh."

"Answer the stupid question!"

"If it's so stupid why do I have to answer it?"

"..."

"OW! Ok, ok. Shish, why do you always resort to violence? Jesus Kim, you're going to kill me one of these days. If your having a bad day, you're most likely pissed out of your mind-"

"That is true."

"So, cheering you up would consist of ice cream, skittles, and either 'The Vow' or 'The Last Song', what ever you're in the mood for."

"You're a smart boy Anderson."

"I know."

"Don't be cocky. Next question. I want to see 'Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2' Do you take me?"

"... Yes."

"REALLY! YOU'D TAKE ME!"

"Knowing you I'm being bribed, guilted or beaten into going so I might as well just agree."

"Will you let be talk about Edwards attractive accent or Jacobs gorgeous abs?"

"NO!"

"...Well you suck."

"Kim, you're mine. You wouldn't like it if I went on about how hot Meghan fox is. I don't like you talking about other guys like that. You're the only girl I see, and I want to be the only guy you see."

"That's cute. Number 4. I would like to go to a concert, but you want to go to the opening of the new skate park. What do we do?"

"Um, that's a tough one. We'd probably go to the concert-"

"Why do you say that?"

"Well, the concert is something we could do together, also a one night thing. The skate park would be there the next day, which happens to be the day I'd drag you there."

"That makes a lot of sense."

"Well I thought it through."

"Next question. I'm going to re word it so it suits us. It's my karate tournament and I'm really nervous. Where are you?"

"Uh, beside you on the bench?"

"..."

"Well! I'm kind of in your dojo... Can we make it a cheer meet?"

"..."

"Stop staring at me like that! It's creepy. Anyways, I probably be sitting in the front row, cheering you on."

"There's an answer! Alright next question-"

"Ugh, how many more?"

"I thought you wanted to prove you're amazing_ boyfriendness_?"

"Could we do it in less questions?"

"Only 2 more."

"Ugh, alright."

"A new girl at school is shamelessly flirting with you. What do you do?"

"I mention you immediately. If she still doesn't shut up I retreat and run away as fast as I can."

"For her sake I hope she shuts up."

"Haha, you'd kill her."

"Yeah I would."

"Why?"

"Why?"

"Yes why."

"Well, cause you're mine. She isn't allowed to flirt with you..."

"Awh, little Kimmy's jealous!"

"..."

"Ow!"

"I'm not jealous."

"No, but you would be."

"Would not!"

"Yes, you so would Kim."

"No!"

"Uh, yes."

"No I wouldn't Jack."

"You'd so be jealous!"

"No I-"

"..."

"You should tell me to shut up like that more often." **(1)**

"I thought it was good."

"Yeah yeah, whatever. Last question. I tell you I love you for the first time, what do you respond with?"

"Really?"

"... Really what?"

"That's the question? I thought it be like some mind blowing shit that no matter what I say it's going to be the wrong answer."

"Come again?"

"That has to be the easiest question ever!"

"Then answer it."

"I would respond I love you to, because I do Kim, I love you."

"Damn right you do Anderson!"

"..."

"What?"

"Seriously Kim?"

"What I do?"

"We can't have one cute moment?"

"We were having a moment?"

"... I don't know how I've put up with you for a year.."

"What was that?"

"I love you?"

"Mmhmm."

"..."

"..."

"So Jack, how about that picnic date?"

"Sounds great Kimmy."

"..."

"OW!"

"Don't call me Kimmy."

* * *

**Ok, done. Personally I don't think this one is as good as the first one.**

**Review anyways?**

**Please let me know if you want to see if I can attempt to keep doing one shots or just leave it as is. **

**Let me know your favourtie parts, lines, what you liked, what you didn't. All comments are welcome and needed. Any ideas you have for possible future chapters? I'd love to hear them. So please let me know :D**

**(1) This was taken from Max who just wrote a story like an hour ago based of the first chapter, except with Jerry and Mika. It was cute, you should check it out :) But yeah, took the line from her. And if you were confused he kissed her so she shut up :)**

**Review and let me know your thoughts :)**


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